Reflections of an ED Teacher

I started working with the ED population as an Instructional Aide. I came to work on my first day full of all the things new teachers are full of…idealism. I was eager to embrace the new career path I had chosen and follow this strong calling in the world to make a difference in someone’s life. I wanted to be a part of change. To put action to the words that pounded in my heart.

By the end of my first week I was shivering. Literally a shivering nauseous wreck. Working in an ED classroom is unlike anything anyone can prepare you for. I was warned during my interview but my idealism bleached out the words. The classroom was filled with teenagers in recovery. They were unmedicated, overmedicated, undiagnosed, hard to diagnose, afraid, fearless, broken, angry, frustrated and most significantly very, very young. A room full of young adults and not one of them adult-like.

Their academic needs were the least of their concerns.

However, I came prepared in one very significant way. I am mentally stable. I am calm. I am grounded. I am consistent. I am a good listener. I am the one thing they have not experienced in a long time. I was not there to heal my past, to fill a hole in my heart, to control or dominate, to feed my ego. I was there to be a part of something I believed in. Even after my first week, I knew I would return. I believed in the program and I knew I had something to offer.

I gathered myself and began a very intense daily ritual of morning meditations and exercise so that I could enter the classroom clear headed and calm. Once I found a way to keep my heart in the right place, I turned my energy on how to partner with the teacher so that we could regain control of the classroom.

We did so by creating stability in the classroom. Consistent schedules. Routine programming. Clearly defined rules. Slowly but swiftly maintaining a quiet, stable learning environment. Consistency, stability, routine. Then we wrote and received a grant for computers. We got our students on coursework that fit their needs and met them where they were at academically.

We listened. We listened. We learned.

After 2 ½ years, I am still working at this school, now as a special education teacher. I have learned invaluable lessons throughout the years. Certain ED students have emotional barriers that can block them from devoting themselves to higher learning. There is a lot of healing, growing, developing, and changing that they have to go through before school becomes the priority. However, we can meet them halfway. We can show up every day and offer a quiet, safe, learning environment and they can use that time to engage in school or they can use that time to engage in the school of life. Social skills are so important for ED students to learn. How they behave in public, how they speak to others, communicate to peers, how they see themselves and their impact on their life. Those lessons are more valuable than anything I can actually teach them in a book.

Our Common Ground Academy, Redwood City CA